TEXAS ANNOUNCES "WORLD WAR I THEME" FOR UPCOMING EXECUTIONS

TEXAS TALK

By : Mr. Brad Livingston, Executive Director, Texas State Criminal Justice Agency (Austin)(2005-present); Former Chief Financial Officer, Texas Board of Criminal Justice (1997-2001); Former Deputy Director, Financial Services Division, Texas Department of Criminal Justice (1997-2001); Accounting Expert; Christian.

Here in Texas, capital punishment works. We are not afraid to swiftly execute offenders. Our prosecutors, judges, legislators and administrators are all on the same page on this: We don't have mercy for killers, rapists, drug dealers and thugs. So we get them out of the community in the surest possible way we can: By lethally injecting them after a couple pointless appeals.

Our State criminal justice system is the best in the Nation because Texans support it. Criminal justice doesn't work without strong backing from the community. Thankfully, our system is both effective and efficient because every Texan knows where criminals belong: Strapped to a gurney in the Huntsville death house. Here at the Corrections Department, we think like Texans. We don't forgive and forget. We inject first and ask questions later.

Capital punishment works in Texas because it brings our community together. Texans love a good execution. Although we do not hang people in public like we did in the old days, we nonetheless widely publicize our executions "21st century style." Texans can stay current with day-to-day executions by logging into our "Executed Offender" database. See http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm. That site provides accurate information about offenders who got their judicially-prescribed dose of potassium bromide. It shows their faces. It describes their crimes. It tells you what they said before they bought the farm. It even tells you what they had for dinner before taking a mosey down the death chamber. Basically, if you want to hear about the latest about executed offenders in Texas, just click on the link and you will get the whole story. Enjoy!

We are committed to bringing Texans a satisfactory capital punishment experience that is both invigorating and entertaining. At the same time, we must note that executions are not cheap. Although the State provides executions free of charge, our capital punishment delivery system has historically operated at a loss. We recently made that fact known to Texans in a local television broadcast. To our great relief, we found that millions of Texans were willing to pay a price to watch a good execution. We even received substantial voluntary donations from private citizens. Those donations defrayed our costs. As Director of the Texas Department of Criminal Justice, I can assure you that Texas will always give you the executions you expect and deserve.

We are thankful that Texans support our criminal justice system. We also know that many Texans wish to directly participate in future executions. We have received many letters from victims' family members requesting the opportunity to push the button that releases chemicals into the offender's bloodstream. Other citizens have requested introducing some new execution methods "just to spruce things up a little bit." Still others have petitioned for larger spectator venues to accommodate all the people who want to see an offender die.

In response to these queries--and to reward Texans for their support--we have decided implement some positive changes to our capital punishment delivery system. Effective immediately, we hereby designate 2010 the year for "World War I Fun" in the Texas criminal justice department. Until further notice, we will execute offenders with vintage World War I weapons. Additionally, we will allow victims' families to directly participate in the execution for a small administrative fee. We believe that this program will bring Texans even closer together, while at the same time teaching a valuable history lesson about World War I. It will give families the chance to take personal revenge on offenders, deter future misconduct and raise funds for the State. In sum, we believe that "World War I Fun" is a "win-win" for both Texans and Texas.

But we need your support to make "World War I Fun" work. To that end, we would like to introduce the various new execution methods available under our new program. If you are a crime victim or a crime victim's relative, carefully review this information to determine which method best suits your needs and your budget. Although we wish we could allow every crime victim to choose the most expensive execution method, we must always observe budgetary constraints. For that reason, we list execution methods in ascending order of price.

1. TRENCH SHOVEL - $50 per execution

Get back at your girlfriend's murderer with this trusty old steel spade. For just $50, you can grab this vintage 1917 shovel and smash that convicted varmint to your heart's content. Notice that the shovel has a sharp edge as well as a flat surface. It also has a good heft for crushing skulls or severing arteries. At just $50 per execution, the trench shovel is an economically wise--yet emotionally fulfilling--way to exact justice on a real Texas bandit. If you wish to bring a friend (or parent) to the execution, the Texas Department of Criminal Justice will provide another shovel for just $25 more--that's a 50% discount! With two shovels, you and your friend can really give the convict a walloping. After you've finished clubbing the criminal to a bloody pulp, corrections officers will add insult to his injury by using the brain-smattered shovels to dig a grave for him out back.

2. BAYONET - $100 per execution

Cut right to the chase with a REAL World War I bayonet! You'll make a slicing impression with this genuine German antique. Your mother's killer will be trembling in his socks when he sees you coming at him with a foot-long silver blade. He'll wish he never raped and shot your mom as you thrust the shiny bayonet into his abdomen. Imagine how scared he'll be as he sits there helplessly strapped to a chair as you slash and stab him to death. You can do anything you want with the bayonet. You can scalp the criminal. You can stab him through the top of the head. You can saw off his fingers. Hell, you could even cut open his stomach and stuff his kidneys in his mouth while he's still alive. Go ahead! Knock yourself out! Do justice! We'll even throw in rubber gloves and a wetsuit for just $50 more so you won't get your nice clothes all bloody.

3. SPRINGFIELD MODEL 1903 - $250 per execution (plus additional ammunition beyond 5 rounds)

If you prefer firearms to close-quarters weapons, then the Springfield M1903 is the choice for you. Don't get your hands dirty. Be an old-fashioned Texas marksman. Line the child rapist up in your sights, get the range right and BLAM! There goes the back of his head. As an added bonus, the Texas Criminal Justice Department will provide an ENTIRE CLIP of ammunition for your amusement; it is our way of saying "thank you" for your support. That means you can take your time with your criminal. You can fire your first shot through his shinbone. Then the next through his hand. You know, whatever you like. Give him a nice gutshot and ask him how he likes it now. But if you do not finish the convict off in five rounds, you must pay $10 per additional bullet. Despite the cost, we are certain that all you Texas sharpshooters out there will really appreciate going round for round on a scumbag with a Springfield. Go for it! Ready, aim, fire!

4. MUSTARD GAS - $500 per execution

Maybe you liked chemistry in high school. Maybe you'd rather use science on a punk than a gun or a knife. If this fits your bill, then Texas Corrections has the solution for you: A genuine mustard gas grenade. For just $500, you can REALLY make a bank robber squirm by tossing some lethal chemicals directly into an airtight container. You can watch him squeal like a pig as he tries to hold his breath. But you'll just laugh, because the mustard gas will burn away his skin at the same time. That'll teach him to touch little girls at the playground! At the same time, you'll learn why most countries outlawed mustard gas after 1918! For the more adventurous citizens out there, mustard gas is the way to go. In Texas, we don't just shoot 'em, beat 'em or stab 'em. We gas 'em, too!

5. MAXIM MACHINE GUN - $1000 per execution (includes 250-round ammunition belt)

If you're a marksman but prefer rapid fire, don't settle for a single shot. Get behind this VINTAGE 1911 Maxim machine gun and UNLOAD into a child molester with a full belt. Learn how the machine gun changed the face of warfare as you demonstrate what 250 30-caliber bullets can do to a Mexican gangster tied to a chair. Have fun with it! Hold down that trigger and roar! Let the machine gun do the talking. Cut the bastard in half if you want to. We regret that the Maxim costs more than other execution methods. It is difficult to find working models that do not jam. Additionally, it takes time to set up the Maxim and calibrate it; this thing weighs a lot. Your $1000 contribution helps defray all these costs. And believe us: Once you squeeze the trigger on this baby, you'll say: "It was worth every dollar!" So what are you waiting for? RAT-A-TAT-TAT, bitches!

NOTE: If the Maxim jams at any time before you complete your 250-round belt, we pledge to refund your $1000 contribution pro rata ($4.00 per round) depending on how many rounds remain in the belt. We also pledge to lend you a Corrections Officer's service pistol to administer a final shot to the offender free of charge.

6. FLAMETHROWER - $2000 per execution

It's time for an old-time Texas barbecue! Take fiery revenge on your wife's lover by toasting him like a stuck hog. For just $2000, we will give you an ORIGINAL 1918 flamethrower with a full tank. Don't mess around with shovels or pistols. Burn the sumbitch alive! Light up the starter, twist on the fuel flow and reduce him into a pile of ashes. Don't worry: He won't turn into ashes before he struggles in vain to escape the flames. Torch him! If you really want to make him regret what he did, don't hose him down right away. Shoot a fireball above his head first. Make him sweat. Then shoot another burst to his left, then his right. Finally, give him just a little scorch. Make him live for a while with peeled-off skin. See how he likes being a victim now. See how fun flamethrowers can be? Nothing says "Ouch" like a full-body burn. And you can only give a full-body burn with a flamethrower. So get in there and start cookin'!

7. BIG BERTHA - $5000 per execution

For Texans who have some money to spare, why not blast a criminal to smithereens? Chances are the offender changed your life forever. Chances are he stole something from you that you can never replace. You probably want to make his life as empty as yours, don't you? If this is the way you feel, BLOW HIM AWAY WITH A BIG BERTHA ARTILLERY GUN! When you pull the firing cord on this baby, there won't be anything left of the man who ruined your life. There won't be anything to bury. Nobody--and no body part--walks away from a 16-inch, 2100-pound high explosive direct hit. When you really just can't stand criminals, nothing says "I hate you" more than landing a Big Bertha shell on his head. For just $5000 (credit available), the Texas Corrections Department will set up a secure firing range, as well as the VINTAGE 1908 "Big Bertha" artillery gun. It will load the weapon, place the offender downrange and allow you to say "FIRE!" before pulling the firing cord. Then, via closed-circuit television, you can watch in slow-motion as the shell falls on the offender. One moment he is there. The next moment he is gone. We will even give you a complimentary DVD recording so you can watch the moment as often as you like for the rest of your life.

In closing, I would like to personally thank Texas for its commitment to criminal justice. Here at the Department of Criminal Justice, I can assure you that we will continue to make executions accessible to the public in a way that is both emotionally satisfying and economically sensible.

Thanks again for your support.

TORTURED PERSPECTIVES : GERMANY

AN ESSAY

Living in the United States, you could be forgiven if you truly thought that all Germans were militaristic killers who secretly worship Hitler. You could be forgiven if you thought that Germans were all icy technocrats who prize efficiency over all else. You could even be forgiven if you thought that all Germans hate Jews. In a word, the American media--through television, film and press--has perpetuated a dangerous stereotype linking "Germans" to "Nazis." Television programs involving Germany typically focus on some barbaric cruelty inflicted during World War II, while most movies involving Germany show Germans murdering innocent civilians, or at least goose-stepping around in slickly-polished boots. The image alternates between the savage and the ruthlessly efficient. If these are the only images an American sees, he can be forgiven for thinking that all Germans are like the sadistic concentration camp commandant in Schindler's List or the treacherous soldier in Saving Private Ryan who slowly stabs an American Jew to death. If this is all you see, what impression will you form?

At the outset, I must be very clear: the Holocaust DID happen and I cannot condemn more strongly the conduct of Germany's National Socialist regime between 1933 and 1945. But I find it unfortunate--and historically unfair--to judge Germany solely on these 12 years. By focusing exclusively on Nazi atrocities during World War II, we blind ourselves to earlier German history. That history reveals an image far less brutal than the one so often shown in movie theaters.

World War II fascinates virtually everybody; and for good reason. There has never been such a cataclysmic encounter between clear "villains" and "the forces of freedom." No war in history has even approached the immense scale and horror experienced between 1939 and 1945. But for all our fascination, we cannot view World War II in a vacuum; earlier events led to the war. The key "earlier event" was World War I.

Almost no one talks about World War I anymore. Almost all World War I veterans are dead. Hollywood does not make movies about it, and it all seems impossibly remote to a modern listener. This is a terrible mistake, because World War I is the key event in modern history. World War II--along with the villainous Germany that facilitated it--would never have happened had World War I never taken place. No other war in history has so altered accepted political and social systems as World War I. Before 1914, monarchs held sway over vast European and foreign empires. After 1918, monarchy was out. The true "modern age" had begun, along with all its intractable modern complexities and industrialized violence. World War II continued the battles left unfinished in 1918. Yet because its scale and drama was greater than World War I--and because it came later--it overshadowed its predecessor. World War II is like the noontime sun, while World War I is like a star that cannot be seen during the day: The light from the sun overpowers the light from the star, even though the star is right there next to the sun.

What does all this have to do with Germany? Just because World War II has burned itself more intensely into our collective memories does not mean it should blind us to other history. If we use World War II as our only historical guide, we would be right to think that Germany was always an intolerant, brutal Nation, even in World War I. But this would be utterly inaccurate. I have often asked acquaintances what they think would have happened had Germany won World War I. Most say that Germany would have conquered all of Europe and subjected all Nations to Hitler-style persecution. I disagree with this assessment, but I know where it comes from: The superimposition of World War II onto all other historical inquiries concerning Germany.

So what was Germany like in the years preceding World War I? Was it a ruthless, intolerant dictatorship as so many Americans believe? Absolutely not. Germany was a constitutional monarchy ruled by a Parliament and an Emperor. The Emperor--like an American President--had Executive power but could not make laws. All males could vote, whether Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Polish or Muslim. The fact that only males could vote at the time should not be seen as repression; even in the United States women were excluded from voting during the same period. Beginning in the 1880s, Germany guaranteed health care, unemployment insurance, social security pensions and accident compensation to all its citizens. Germany dedicated an immense part of its budget to caring for wounded veterans. In 1901, Germany had the third-largest Jewish population in Europe, thanks to a State policy of religious tolerance and excellent commercial opportunities. In 1912, Marxists composed the largest contingency in Parliament. Although the Emperor was unelected, he depended on the democratically-elected Reichstag to enact legislation. There was even a constitutional free press guarantee.

Does this sound like Nazi Germany? Religious freedom? Freedom of the press? Universal health care and unemployment insurance? Marxists in Parliament? Democratic elections for representatives in Parliament? It is hard to imagine a starker contrast. Although Imperial Germany vested executive power in a monarch, virtually every European country embraced monarchy in some form during this period. Even "democracies" like the United States did not provide social care to their citizens, nor did they so readily tolerate left-wing political expression in government.

Why does no one remember these liberal traditions in German history? Again, World War II has poisoned foreign understandings about Germany. It would not fit the barbaric stereotype about Germany if Americans suddenly learned that Germany had universal health care and unemployment insurance in 1884. After all, barbaric governments do not provide such compassionate assistance to their citizens. Nor do tyrannical governments allow political expression and universal suffrage. Yet Imperial Germany provided all these things to its citizens at a time when even the United States did not.

World War II also poisoned foreign understandings about Germany's motives in World War I. Under the "World War II" view, Americans think that Germany was a belligerent Nation bent on world domination. In 1939, Germany launched a war of aggression against its neighbors. It initiated vicious racial purification programs in the conquered territories, eradicating both ethnic and political opposition. It appeared to have no intention to relinquish the countries it conquered. But in 1914, Germany blundered into war without any intention to permanently annex new territory, let alone to exterminate millions in ethnic and religious minorities. Germany invaded France because it had treaty obligations to Austria-Hungary, which foolishly triggered war with Russia, France's ally. Throughout World War I, Germany was not fighting to exterminate "Untermenschen" or expand Germany's "Lebensraum." It was fighting due to a failed system of European alliances. If Germany had won World War I, there would have been no World War II-style oppression. Most likely, Germany would have taken some punitive steps against its adversaries, but would certainly not have begun slaughtering Jews, Poles, gypsies, homosexuals and Communists. After all, Jews, Poles, Communists and--although not declared as such--homosexuals formed essential parts of Germany's political system. In a word, Germany in World War I was not an intolerant Nation bent on world domination. Yet through the lens of World War II, many Americans assume that Germany "has always been" both intolerant and repressive.

I do not hide the fact that I am partial to Germany for several reasons. First, I am of direct German descent. Second, based on my studies I believe that Germany has borne an unfair stigma for a very limited period in its history. While this does not excuse Germany for its actions between 1933 and 1945, it also does not excuse us from simplistically assuming that Germany "has been and always will be" a violent, repressive society. Indeed, any fair investigation will reveal that precisely the opposite has been true for many centuries. Germany has a long history of liberalism, from artistic excellence to religious tolerance to intellectual freedom. The corrupt legacy of World War II has unfairly overshadowed all these cultural achievements. True, Germany also has a profoundly militaristic history, but its unique position in central Europe--caught between at least three powerful foreign enemies--partially explains its insistence on military strength. Furthermore, it is unfair to brand Germany "militaristic" for its actions during a time when all European powers jockeyed for military dominance, whether at home or in overseas colonies. In that sense, Germany's military prominence in the 18th and 19th Centuries is hardly unique. If military power alone signified a tendency toward repression, then Great Britain must certainly be counted as a "naturally repressive" State. Indeed, Britain waged nearly constant war during the 19th Century, from North America to Belgium to Portugal to South Africa to the Crimea to Hong Kong to India. It constantly maintained the world's most powerful navy, yet few Americans today view Britain's military prominence as proof that it was a naturally repressive State.

In sum, I think German history has suffered from gross historical distortion. Modern media has perpetuated this distortion. Unless Americans do their own research about German history, they will have no reason to think that Germany has been--and always will be--something akin to the Third Reich. Germans are profoundly aware of this distortion. While virtually all Germans deeply regret the darkest part of their history between 1933 and 1945, many now feel that continued prejudice against them is unwarranted. For generations now, Germans have been instructed to be ashamed of themselves for actions they never took. They have been instructed to suppress patriotic expression because they are told it is "dangerous" to have nationalistic feelings for Germany. These impositions have led to greater and greater resentment, precisely because Germans understand that they should not be over-punished for a discrete period in their long history. They know that for generations Germany has been a beacon for liberalism and tolerance in Europe. Yet in world media they see themselves portrayed as inveterate Nazis. These portrayals ignore all German history aside from World War II, perpetuating a lasting historical distortion.

Once living links die, media and second-hand accounts shape public understanding. We no longer have a living link to World War I, and the trauma of World War II has so dominated popular thought that it allows little room for reflecting on what came before. But it is dangerous to rely on popular history, because history will always reflect a distinct political or social perspective. Only by investigating all the evidence can we gain a clearer understanding about historical events. That means looking beyond stereotypes forged from a single historical experience. When it comes to German history, it is essential to examine more than just the National Socialist experience. We must look further back to see what Germany truly was. It is not an exaggeration to say that postwar Germany simply picked up the pieces scattered by the Nazis in 1933. Modern Germany--like Imperial Germany before it--enshrines many of the liberal ideals that have traditionally found expression in German life. Postwar Germany broke radically from the Nazi regime, but it did not break radically from overriding German political and social traditions. Today, Germany is again one of the most liberal Nations on earth. But that is nothing new; it only seems surprising because many Americans think that before 1945 Germany had never been anything but a savage, repressive State.

America has a perplexing interest in maintaining the idea that Germany is a dangerous, habitually violent Nation. In 1999, I applied for a Fulbright scholarship under which I proposed to explore many of the ideas raised in this essay. I wanted to illustrate that America has distorted the historical record about Germany by creating a stereotypical understanding about Germans that fixes all inquiry on World War II. My application was denied on "political grounds." It was too inflammatory. Apparently, the American government did not want me to disturb the fabric underlying German-American relations, or to expose the embarrassing cultural myopia that plagues most Americans' understanding about Germany. In America today, many still equate Germans with Nazis, thanks in large part to the endless media bombardment that reinforces that connection.

In hindsight, I am happy that I did not receive funding from the American government. I have given up on America's ability to conduct fair foreign relations. Perhaps Obama will restore some of America's credibility on the world stage. But I doubt he will influence the endless tide of negative press and media about Germany. Only time will tell whether the historical distortion about Germany will ever subside.