THE PEOPLE OF THE CITY OF CHICAGO, STATE OF ILLINOIS IN GENERAL ASSEMBLY
Chicago, Illinois
RICHARD M. DALEY, MAYOR
PREAMBLE : We, the elected representatives of the People of the City of Chicago in the State of Illinois, authorized by the City Charter to act for the general welfare and moral edification of all City residents, and acting in defense of children everywhere, do hereby pass this ACT intended to protect the health, safety and community spirit of this Great City.
§ 1 – SHORT TITLE : This Act shall be known as the “MANDATORY CHICAGO SPORTS FAN REPORTING ACT” (hereinafter, the “Act”).
§ 2 - PURPOSES : The People of the City of Chicago intend to memorialize their understanding that sports team devotion is a citizen’s single most important civic duty. Allegiance to a Chicago city sports team is necessary to sustain robust public pride. The City Council desires to reinforce city pride and cohesion by requiring all city residents—no matter the duration of their residency—to declare allegiance to a Chicago city sports team every calendar year, beginning January 1, 2009. The Council believes that compulsion is necessary to ensure that every Chicago resident keeps his or her priorities straight in life. Sports are a priority in Chicago. Every Chicago citizen must be a sports fan. Law is the only way to ensure proper dedication to an eligible Chicago city sports team. The Council believes that the Act will improve civic and community life by creating a city esprit de corps revolving around eligible sports teams. The General Assembly further believes that enforcement of the Act will create jobs and raise revenue for the city.
§ 3 – DEFINITIONS : The following definitions apply throughout this Act:
(a) Resident : A “resident” is any living person within the city limits of the city of Chicago. This term includes everyone, even those merely passing through the city, also known as “Transitory Residents” (see below at § 5).
(b) Eligible Chicago City Sports Team : An “Eligible Chicago City Sports Team” includes and is strictly limited to the following professional sports franchises headquartered within the city of Chicago: (i) The Chicago Cubs; (ii) The Chicago White Sox; (iii) The Chicago Bears; (iv) The Chicago Blackhawks; (v) The Chicago Bulls; (vi) Chicago Fire.
(c) Reporting Period: “Reporting Period” means January 1 through December 31 in any calendar year beginning in 2009.
(d) Allegiance Form: An “Allegiance Form” means a paper or electronic affirmation that a Resident is a Fan of an Eligible Chicago City Sports Team.
(e) Fan : A “Fan” means a Resident who believes strongly in the success of any Eligible Chicago City Sports team. “Fans” must attend at least 10 home games played by the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team indicated in such “Fan’s” Allegiance Form during any Reporting Period.
(f) Enforcement Bureau : “Enforcement Bureau” means any office, institution, patrol, group or individual constituted by city Charter to enforce the provisions of this Act.
§ 4 – OBLIGATIONS OF RESIDENTS : During every Reporting Period, Residents must:
(a) Obtain an Allegiance Form from any duly-authorized city agency;
(b) Submit said Allegiance From in a manner consistent with all applicable local laws;
(c) State under oath that such Resident is a Fan of an Eligible Chicago City Sports Team;
(d) Attend at least ten (10) home games played by the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team identified in said Resident’s Allegiance Form;
(e) Retain receipts as proof of attendance at all home games described in § 4(d);
(f) Mail all receipts described in § (4)(e) to a duly-authorized city agency prior to the end of the Reporting Period;
(g) Publicly display devotion to the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team identified in such Resident’s Allegiance Form for the applicable Reporting Period;
(h) Maintain a regular cable television subscription for coverage of all regular and postseason games played by the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team identified in such Resident's Allegiance Form for the applicable Reporting Period;
(i) Pay an annual Submission Fee of $150.00 for each Allegiance Form submitted, payable within 30 days of said submission.
§ 5 – OBLIGATIONS OF TRANSITORY RESIDENTS : Transitory residents have the same obligations as all other Residents under this Act. To ensure compliance with this Act, Enforcement Bureaus are hereby authorized to construct compliance checkpoints at all roadways and railways leading in or out of the city of Chicago. Enforcement Bureaus are hereby authorized to stop all motorists or rail travelers at such checkpoints to verify their Allegiance Form status for the applicable Reporting Period. Additionally, Enforcement Bureaus are hereby authorized to question all national and international travelers arriving at or departing from Chicago city airports to verify Allegiance Form status for the applicable Reporting Period. Any Transitory Resident found not to have duly submitted an Allegiance Form for the applicable Reporting Period shall be required to make a declaration consistent with this Act, and to pay a penalty of $1,000 U.S. Currency, plus the usual $150.00 Submission Fee (see § 4(i)).
§ 6 – PUBLIC DISPLAY OF DEVOTION : Consistent with § 4(g), all Residents are obligated to publicly display devotion to the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team identified in such Residents’ Allegiance Form for the applicable Reporting Period. Such displays must consist of:
(a) Wearing Eligible Chicago City Sports Team-marked clothing at least twice per week;
(b) Discussing Eligible Chicago City Sports Team events at least once per day; but on Mondays, Residents must discuss such events at least three times (3) per day;
(c) Placing Eligible Chicago City Sports Team bumper stickers on their automobiles;
(d) Possessing at least one (1) photograph of: (i) Michael Ditka; (ii) Michael Jordan; or (iii) Harry Caray. Photographs of Brian Urlacher will not be considered;
(e) Drinking at least two (2) toasts to Eligible Chicago City Sports Team players each weekend day during the applicable Reporting Period;
(f) Painting one’s face with the colors of the Eligible Chicago City Sports Team identified in such Resident’s Allegiance Form at least once during the applicable Reporting Period;
(g) Sending a verified photograph of each Resident’s compliance with § 6(f) to a duly-authorized city agency within 30 days of the taking of such photograph.
§ 7 – ENFORCEMENT AND PENALTIES :
(i) The Chicago Police Department;
(ii) The Chicago Department of Jails;
(iii) The Chicago Airport Authority;
(iv) The Mayor’s Office;
(v) The Department of Sewers;
(vi) The Department of Parking Enforcement;
(vii) The Department of Streets and Sanitation;
and
(viii) The Department of Revenue.
(b) Authorized Executive Branch officers are hereby empowered to conduct random stops to verify any Resident’s compliance with the Act. Upon such stops, officers shall ask the following questions: “Are you a Resident of the City of Chicago? Are you a sports fan? Are you a Cubs fan? Are you a Sox fan? Are you a Bears fan? Are you Blackhawks fan? Are you a Bulls fan? Are you a Fire fan?” If such resident responds that he is not a fan of any of the aforementioned teams, the officer shall state: “I am going to have to take you in for violating the Mandatory Chicago Sports Fan Reporting Act.”
§ 8 - SPECIFIC OFFENSES AGAINST THE ACT :
(2) Willful Failure to Report Fan status for more than two (2) Reporting Periods is a Class A Felony punishable by up to 20 years in prison and a $100,000 fine.
(3) Negligent Failure to Properly Complete an Allegiance Form is a Class A Misdemeanor punishable by up to 6 months in prison and a $1,500 fine.
(4) Intentionally Supporting a Rival Team is a Class A-1 Felony punishable by death or life in prison, notwithstanding compliance with this Act in all other respects.
(5) Ignorance of the law shall not be a defense to any crime enumerated in this Section, consistent with principles of Illinois criminal law, and any provision of the State or United States Constitution notwithstanding.
(6) Conviction under any offense enumerated in this Section shall never be judicially determined to be a deprivation of life, liberty or property without Due Process under the State or United States Constitutions.
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