Friday, September 12, 2008

A LAWYER'S CONFESSION

Recently, State Bar authorities received information that a well-respected commercial litigator was consuming up to four beers per night on weekdays. At Reason, Commerce, Justice & Free Beer, we take charges against legal professionals very seriously. In the interest of justice, we publish the accused lawyer's explanatory letter:

"I am not a drunkard. I consume alcohol on a semi-weekly, recreational basis only, pursuant always to responsible protocols and in good taste. Additionally, my alcohol consumption is always subject to applicable rules, laws and regulations (cf. Federal Register, current as of 09/12/2008), including but in no way limited to any and all exceptions and/or qualifications related thereto and promulgated thereunder. Weekend alcohol consumption, by contrast, poses a discrete inquiry not at issue here."

Respectfully submitted,

Mr. Ambler H. Ross, Esq., Order of the Coif
Equity Partner & Senior Billing Coordinator
Chatwell, Grabbin & Cashe LLC
1166 Avenue of the Americas, Suite 5780
New York, NY 10019

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